Jesus ‘Probably Would Have Hated Derry’ Declares Controversial Kildress Priest
A north Tyrone priest, who was threatened with a defrocking in 1993 after denouncing Derry’s All Ireland title as ‘the work of the devil’, has incurred the wrath of the Vatican again after declaring that Jesus Christ probably would have hated Derry as he was allergic to oak and allegedly had a run-in with a member of the Doherty clan who refused to pay for work done, during his time as a carpenter near Galilee.
Fr Teague, a 69-year-old ex-doorman, joined the priesthood in his 30s after becoming disillusioned with the slagging he was getting at the door of the Pink Pussycat nite club in Cookstown, especially from lads from Magherafelt.
During his homily last weekend which was streamed online, he stated:
“I’m nearly sure Jesus the Lord himself would have detested Derry and Derry GAA especially. He had a horrible experience from Derry ones when he was earning a living. He put down floorboards in a house in Galilee. A Derry family had moved there because it sounded like Galliagh in Derry city. They never paid him. Pure Derry behaviour that.”
The Vatican has given Fr Teague a final warning and have told him to stop using Christianity to get at Derry.
In other news, Bonnie Tyler has bought a house in Brocagh as a second home. She has asked for privacy and will shoot anyone selling tickets.