News from amongst the bushes. Accuracy cannot be guaranteed.
Contact: paudgemcgaudge@yahoo.co.uk
Reporters:
Gombeen (77). A semi-retired spoon-player. Loves beetroot and classical music.
Shengas McGlumphie (71). Homeless ex-juggler with an eye for a story.
Pat Muckles (88). 1944 Rose of Tralee escort.
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Tyrone Tribulations 
tyrone is shite
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Strabane is really shite
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nice one. keep ‘er lit and take it handy.
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Hi lads, have you a contact email?
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paudgemcgaudge@yahoo.co.uk
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What happen to CSI Stewartstown?
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Funding dried up. Bloody yanks
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Dear Mr O’Neills and assorted Gerard Quinns, we in South Derry find ourselves in the embarrassing position of no longer having any need of Moneymore, Ballyronan and something called ‘The Loup’.
If you would like to have them back now, no money need exchange hands. I appreciate that you might view the aforementioned as spoiled goods but think of them as ‘damaged/repairables’ or even break them up for spare parts.
Please also be advised that a smooth transition now might very well lead to us looking at the eventual transfer of the entire Barony of Loughinsholinn. (We may keep Bellaghy for potential poetry and flags)
Yours, well not your’s just yet.
Portglenone. (Which is in Anrtim) (Mostly)
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Can’t help but think you’re up to something here….where’s the catch?
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No catch, in fact there is an un-repealed by-law from 1741 which states that in the event of any such transfer, both Tyrone and Derry would have to hand over their Cladys to Armagh. It’s win-win.
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Ye wudn’t drap me an email at paudgemcgaudge@yahoo.co.uk, ffs.
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Ya see? I knew negotiating with a Tyrone man would be like trying to pick up mercury with a fork.
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You do a great job for Tyrone. Maybe County Down needs a similar news site. On the other hand, our real news may be mad enough, with dangerous wallabies on the loose.
http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/local-national/northern-ireland/escaped-wallaby-and-baby-joey-police-warn-co-down-public-not-to-approach-animals-30079756.html
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More power to ye. Regards from Thom at the immortal jukebox.
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Love it!Keep up the good work…….real cutting edge news reporting at last!
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Thank you. We try our best!
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Good honest news, nearly wet meself! Thanks Tyrone!
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hello
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Greetings from the Untied States of Analgesia (USA),
Some of us whose relatives had the good sense to immigrate from your county a few centuries ago have been following your shenanigans with great admiration. Perhaps, should you be released early for good behavior (unlikely, I suppose) there would be a place for the lot of you here in the Land ‘O Plenty (o’ bullcrap). We need more truth tellers like you! The National Lampoon and the Onion pull their punches, and Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart are a couple of pikers, as you probably know. So-have at it, lads! See you at the Statue.
Cheers,
Seamless McTrousers
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Good stuff!
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Good evening everyone, I want to ask you all for your help please.I swear to God that I am telling the truth and whether you know Mrs.Margaretu Loughrey won the lottery and urgent and very important is that I have to find you and because of you all Ask for help if you contact me on my email address please.Please consider this comment seriously and this is no joke, you know, and I hope that any of you know a contact number or email address Mrs.Margarete please.Only Mrs.Margareta Loughrey can to save human life and that’s it, and please let me know if you find out what people please dear.Mrs.Margareta Loughrey lives in Strabane, County Tyrone that you and I hope you will contact me if you find out what or who you know and this is my email address: nerminrasidovic@yahoo.com
Please if you know what to answer to my e-mail address and greetings to all of you once again.Good night. . .
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why is your picture not coloured if you photo was took in 2012 coloured photos came out in the 1890 s if it was took in 2012 you cant have took it as you are 77
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aye
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True about Trillick. You do know that, during the time of the old E and W Co Boards, Trillick were so fed up with the bias against them that they officially played in Fermanagh league for a while. (Actually a fact.).
Even today, most of the kids go to school in Fermanagh, we mostly shop and socialise in Fermanagh, half the parish (Coa) is in Fermanagh, we’ve got Fermanagh accents. We just happen to play football in Tyrone. But without the football, most of us would never venture further inland than Dromore. The real Tyrone accent starts in Dromore; we can’t really understand it. By the time you get to Omagh, it’s a comedy accent (‘goe-alls’ instead of ‘goals’; ‘keek’ instead of ‘kick’) and by the time you get to Newtownstewart (apparently pronounced ‘Nnyynn-hi’, it’s pure gibberish from that point on.
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