Stag reacts to first sip

A stag party’s celebrations ended prematurely after a ‘slight miscalculation’ in the alcohol content of a new whiskey brewed in Pomeroy resulted in all ten party members receiving attention in Enniskillen hospital for ruptured throat and stomach linings after initial feelings of crazed merriment.

‘Sluggan Whiskeys’ owner James O’Kane, who opened his doors to visitors at the weekend, have promised to look into the mistake but also hinted that the men were ‘maybe not hard enough drinkers‘.

Groom-to-be Daithi O’Giles admitted he had grave reservations about the product before the free consumption at the end of the tour:

“I did think it was a bit worrying when they took us to the brewing room and all we saw were four large buckets of barley and a man throwing kettles of hot water over them and mashing it by jumping up and down on them with his wife. Then they threw it into a vat-type thing for three years and hoped for the best.”

Sluggan Whiskeys, whose slogan is ‘The Wacky Brain of Jamesy O’Kane’, have agreed to buy an ABV (alcohol by volume) gauge if their advertisement for a whiskey taster fails to gain any applications after the weekend’s mishap.

“We’ve always had a fair idea of how much alcohol there was in the brew by throwing it at the wall and seeing what damage it does to the paint. Unfortunately those methods seem outdated now and we apologise to the stag lads. But they have to admit they were in great form for the first ten minutes after consumption. Hopefully they’ll take up our offer of a bottle of our first turf-flavoured whiskey in 2018 for the discounted price of £70.”

Sluggan Whiskeys also agreed to review their charging policy after the stag party were each asked for their £20 tour fee as they exited the premises on stretchers.