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Kurt Cobain ‘Just Loved Carrickmore’ Says Biographer
On the 30th anniversary of his untimely death, Kurt Cobain’s official biographer Billy Smiley has revealed that Carrickmore’s inability to win the senior championship every year inspired most of his angst-ridden songs.
Cobain, who wanted to visit the graveyard in Carrickmore which is the final resting place for several of Kurt’s Irish ancestors, developed a sharp dislike for their rivals Errigal Ciaran and once arrived late to an unplugged MTV concert as he was listening to the final between the two rivals on the wireless.
Smiley added:
“Jesus, he hated Peter Canavan. And he was a mad fan of Seamus McCallan. The song, Smells Like Teen Spirit, was named in honour of Seamie who had a great game for Carrickmore minors in the late 80s and Cobain read about it. He just loved Carrickmore.”
Cobain had plans to see McCallan in action in the 1994 Ulster final.
In other news, the Ulster Council has apologised for tarmacking the whole of the Coalisland Canal instead of the towpath.
Clamp Down On Drinking Nuns Hits Killyclogher Pub Hard
Nuns up for the craic
Following the news that people dressed as nuns were caught drinking after-hours in Listowel last July, Killyclogher pub-owner Jessie McGinn claims the fallout and subsequent tightening of nun drinking may force him to close the bar soon due to loss of revenue. Although the Kerry contingent were not real nuns but dressed in the garb for a charity idea, the nuns drinking in Killyclogher are bona-fide members of the Sisters of the Holy Hedge from Donemana who have traditionally used McGinn’s for a ‘good oul blow-out’ at the weekends and sometimes during the week. Sister Cecilia has no doubt that the Kerry escapade has impacted on their libation habits:
“I know it was for charity and I suppose that’s a good thing, but them lads in Listowel have given the powers that be here to clamp down on our running about and general galavanting. To be brutally honest, we’re totally pissed off. For years we’ve been heading down to McGinn’s on a Friday and drinking the bit out til Sunday at least. Sister Concepta is deadly on the Karaoke, singing stuff by Kurt Cobain or ACDC. The lads here think we’re great craic and a wee bit of innocent flirting with nuns of all ages is the only excitement they get down here. It was a win-win situation for everyone but now that’s all changed because of them winos down in Kerry. This weekend we had to sit in and watch The Late Late Show, supping on Ribena. Eff me pink like.”
Jessie McGinn says last weekend’s profits took a serious downtown, coupled with the general pessimistic mood of the lads who were missing the women and their flying habits and the woman who sings ‘Whole Lotta Rosie’.
“I’ll give it another week and if I don’t see an upturn in takings then big decisions need to be made. There is a group of women from the Drumragh Book Club and we’ll be trying to entice them down here for a feed of drink but it’s hard to see them being the same craic as the Holy Hedge girls.”
The Sisters of the Holy Hedge was founded in 1967 when someone spotted a hedge that looked a bit like Pope Urban VIII on the Gortin Road.
Tyrone Tribulations 