Omagh’s ‘Shawshank Husband’ Dug Tunnel From Bedroom To Pub Over 15 Years

Kerr re-enacts tunnel movement

Kerr re-enacts tunnel movement

An Omagh plumber tunnelled a hole from under his bed to the local pub 800 feet from his house over the course of 15 years, a court heard today.

Patsy Kerr had been summonsed to Omagh County Court after it emerged he had been the cause of a collapsed sewage pipe from a neighbouring house. Kerr told the court about his secret tunnel and the reasons behind it:

“The wife has a bad snore on her and after watching the Shawshank Redemption on RTE one night in 1994, I decided to do something about it so I waited til she was in a deep sleep and then set about digging a hole under the bed in the direction of the pub. I used all manner of tools from spoons to a heavy duty tunnel boring machine I managed to sneak down there when she was at the shops. It wasn’t until 2009 that I hit the jackpot and came up through the women’s toilet mop and bucket room.”

Kerr explained how he spent the last five years heading to the pub via his tunnel at 11pm before returning at 1am, undetected by his deep sleeping wife:

“To be honest I was sort of glad I was caught. She was always smelling drink off me in the morning and I was explaining it away as a natural odour. But recently I was finding myself singing rebel songs and stuff coming back up the tunnel and it was only a matter of time before I was caught anyhow. The landlord was also wondering how I was just appearing out of nowhere at the same time every night and disappearing from the women’s toilets.”

The tunnel was finally discovered after the DOE performed a survey on a sewage problem which turned out to be caused by a pipe Kerr had hit accidentally, causing sewage to leak into his tunnel over five years. The judge questioned Kerr’s wife as to why she never smelt the sewage odours from her husband. Mrs Kerr simply shrugged.

About Gombeen

Trying hard to make it up.

Posted on September 25, 2014, in Omagh and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 111 Comments.

  1. LoL! I love the Irish for a good yarn.

    Like

  2. better when wife dont know then dos who see his affairr and to see the girls (pay everything fro him)

    Like

  3. It gives a whole new meaning to drinking in some hole in the wall lol

    Like

  4. Where is Omagh? Sounds like a fun place.

    Like

  5. Lol, this is hilarious. Ps- I loved that movie.
    -Teal
    http://www.tealtomato.com

    Like

  6. rrr lots of dispute…………divorce te with……..go to the pub………..much easier…., besides a quart of milk is alway cheaper than buying the whole cow

    Like

  7. I was thinking this was a true story until I clocked the crucial missing detail. If he was singing rebel songs when coming back along the tunnel, why didn’t somebody’s mother find his beret? Hang on a minute – somebody tried that one last week….

    Like

  8. Thank you
    Blog fantastic
    Good luck
    ………………
    http://www.8ii.in

    Like

  9. She smelled the booze and never noticed he was shit faced? Does she have a sister?

    Like

  10. You folks fooled me. I posted this on social media as a true story. Then after some re-reading of the story of Patsy Kerr tunneling to the pub … I realized what a preposterous tall tale it is. You got me good.

    I got taken-in by the atmospherics and the details: Patsy testifying in court and admitting his wrongdoing in undermining the sewage pipes, his striking a lucky vein and coming-up in the mop closet of the rest rooms, his wife detecting the smell of booze on him and his deflecting her suspicion.

    Well, now I’m going to read all the rest of the “news stories” here at your site. — Mike Mooney, Albany, New York, U.S.

    Like

  11. Fool!!!!!
    He could have killed her and had an alibi!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Well at least you can say he’s not drink driving Lola haha

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I to was somewhat taken aback by all the details but the preposterousness of digging a hole for 15 years, to drink? Does make it Sound more like a tall tell. Although this being said, this does go against my main Mantra which I live by on a daily basis.
    “Believe Anything is Possible ~~ If You Believe” and For whatever you focus on is what you will attract.

    Like

  14. Reblogged this on Tyrone Tribulations and commented:

    A year ago today…..

    Like

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