The Island Men Built This By Mistake

A recent addition to the prehistoric monument library in London’s chief library has claimed that a group of Coalisland lads over looking for work in England 3000 years ago built the Stonehenge construction after another unsuccessful night out chasing the local women whilst most likely drinking ether or absinthe. Why the Fianna labourers built the monument is still open to interpretation although expert archeologist Dr Fredrick Winston OBE has put forward a couple of hypotheses:

“Firstly, let us acknowledge these brave innovators from Coalisland who came over here to lay down a few roads over 3000 years ago. Having arrived here they probably realised that roads hadn’t been invented yet nor train tracks for that matter. It’s a likely scenario that they decidhed to stay in England for the time being before making the long trek back to Coalisland by foot, a journey lasting 133 days. Personally, I believe they decided to built some kind of construction, hoping to entice the local women with their labouring skills. They definitely were not some kind of Pagans or spiritual hippies. Just after a bit of skirt I think. They appear to have erected coarse load-bearing walls with the intention of adding the plasterboard later. What went wrong we cannot ascertain but it’s likely they just gave up the ghost what with the effects of hardened drinking and simply threw up a few long irregular stones to act as ceilings. “

A group of Coalisland Historical Committee members have put in place plans to finish off what their forefathers started and build some kind of courting court or brothel that the original planners probably intended to do. The British Archeological Society will receive notification of their idea later in the week. Timmy Herron is confident they’ll get the green light.

“It’d be a crying shame if they don’t let us finish off the whorehouse, like. We in Coalisland have a long history of building things. Eastern Building Supplies recently built the outhouse around the back of the Cohannon Inn and anyone who has used the toilet there says it’s a great job and you can do your business in comfort.”

The book – “The Crazy Womanizing ‘Island Navvies Weren’t Hippies At All” will be on sale next year some time.