Cookstown Politician Comes Out As A Vegetarian

andrew-martin-001A Cookstown Councillor has today bravely announced to his constituency and beyond that he’s a full-blown vegetarian.

Brian Sheehy admitted his decision to come forward was inspired by recent politicians who have announced their own personal preferences on a range of issues from their favourite colour to sexuality.

Sheehy, fighting back the tears at a hastily-arranged press conference outside Margaritas Restaurant Wine and Cocktail Bar in sub-zero conditions, told us:

“I have to do this to kill the rumour-circuit concerning my dietary habits. Yes, it’s true – I’m a rampant vegetarian. I haven’t let a steak near my gob since 2003. Judge me if you want but I have faith in the Cookstown people that they won’t turn their backs on me just because I’m into lettuce and tomatoes.”

The scale of Sheehy’s predicament was brought home during the interview when a passing Ford Fiesta slowed down enough for a man to stick his head out and shout ‘go on ye big cauliflowerhead, suck a carrot’ in a strong East Tyrone accent.

A quivering Sheehy continued:

“If I lose votes on this, so be it. I can’t help it if I prefer a cucumber to a couple of tuna baps.”

The councillor added that he is most certainly not a vegan as he likes a glass of milk before bed and sometimes wears mink fur coats to church.

One-time voter Harry Quinn revealed he’ll not be voting for Sheehy again:

“That bollocks can go and shite. If a man turns down a ham shank in favour of a few tomatoes is not to be trusted with things like fixing roads and getting the broadband in.”

Other vegetarians are expected to come out from the shadows after this news.

Advertisements

About Gombeen

Trying hard to make it up.

Posted on January 19, 2015, in Cookstown and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Fourteen Lines

A Sonnet Obsession

The Irish Peace Process

Catholic Afterthoughts

Ryan Harper Writing

Short Stories, Poems and Songs and random observations

My Journey:

Me and my daughters journey with a GATA2 deficiency, myelodysplasia, a bone marrow transplant and beyond..............

Amber, Like the Traffic Light

Twenty-something, dog obsessed, book-binging gal

Minimal Belle

Creative, mindful & compassionate living

Blog about Mexico's Must Have Seen

Playa del Carmen, Tulum, Cancun, Riviera Maya, Cenotes, Sian Ka'an, Cozumel, Bacalar, Mahahual, Monterrey...

Blogger, interrupted...

“since our apparitions, the part of us which appears, are so momentary compared with the other, the unseen part of us, which spreads wide, the unseen might survive, be recovered somehow attached to this person or that, or even haunting certain places, after death. Perhaps - perhaps.”

Simplify Your English Blog

Put Your Thoughts into Words Better

Anroworld

The only thing better than curling up with a good book to read is sitting down at the computer with a good story to film!

SteveInVancouver

Just another WordPress.com site

%d bloggers like this: