Royal Birth A Relief To Foremen Across The County. Coalisland Man To Take Pics.

Coalisland, earlier

Coalisland, earlier

Foremen from across the county breathed a sigh of relief after a day of minimal productivity as builders kept checking their phones to see if Prince William in England had a baby yet. The birth tonight means work levels should return to normal unless they start debating names. Henry Henderson of Coalisland, who’s overseeing the construction of a new coal museum in the town, says hardly a brick was built today:

“Well that was a disaster, like. I have 22 lads on site here and all they did was check their phones for Facebook and twitter updates on that buckin woman. One fellow, from Annaghmore, failed to attend the birth of his own child today in case he missed out on the craic with the lads if the other one was born in England. The country has couped. I blame Sky TV and that Graham Norton boy”.

Dermot Devlin from Crannagh, a plumber at the site, says he was looking forward to a good sleep tonight.

“Jaysus us I never slept a wink last night over the head of it. All I could think of was oul William pacing the hospital’s corridors and yer woman screaming. Then there’s the oul Queen and her maybe suffering in the heat with the crown on and all that regalia. She didn’t need to be worrying about this. I’ll have a beer tonight.”

Other major news tonight from Coalisland has shocked the world’s paparazzi as local photographer Olly Carr has been chosen to take the first pics of the child. A shellshocked Carr told us:

“Holy God. Surely not. All I have is a wee disposable yoke from Boots after my main contraption melted at Peatland’s Park yesterday. This is some handlin. I wouldn’t even know what road to take to get to Buckingham. I think the M1 would be quickest. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t excited like. I’ll take a few close ups of yer woman houlin the chile saying ‘cheese’ and then get out. What is she called anyway? Hope there’s sandwiches laid on”.

Advertisements

About Gombeen

Trying hard to make it up.

Posted on July 22, 2013, in Coalisland, Cranagh and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Just brilliant, Loved it.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Ryan Harper Writing

Short Stories, Poems and Songs and random observations

My Journey:

Me and my daughters journey with a GATA2 deficiency, myelodysplasia, a bone marrow transplant and beyond..............

Amber, Like the Traffic Light

Twenty-something, dog obsessed, book-binging gal

Minimal Belle

Creative, mindful & compassionate living

Blog about Mexico's Must Have Seen

Playa del Carmen, Tulum, Cancun, Riviera Maya, Cenotes, Sian Ka'an, Cozumel, Bacalar, Mahahual, Monterrey...

Blogger, interrupted...

“since our apparitions, the part of us which appears, are so momentary compared with the other, the unseen part of us, which spreads wide, the unseen might survive, be recovered somehow attached to this person or that, or even haunting certain places, after death. Perhaps - perhaps.”

Simplify Your English Blog

Put Your Thoughts into Words Better

Anroworld

The only thing better than curling up with a good book to read is sitting down at the computer with a good story to film!

SteveInVancouver

Just another WordPress.com site

That Football Analysis

A New Way of Discussing the Beautiful Game

Le Blog BlookUp

Imprimez et transformez vos contenus digitaux, blogs et réseaux sociaux, en magnifiques livres papier sur blookup.com

Brenners Mc Goo Blogger

Passionate about travel, adventures and exploration. Lover of the natural world... obsessed with natural cosmetics, growing your own and yoga!

%d bloggers like this: