Unlikely romance?

One of Ireland’s leading body language and relationship psychologists has claimed she is 99% convinced Joe Brolly may actually have romantic inclinations towards Tyrone midfielder Sean Cavanagh, despite recent uncomplimentary remarks by the Dungiven barrister.

Susan LeMonde, who has councelled many high profile personalities from Hollywood to Howth, has studied hours of footage since 2003 and maintains Brolly spends 39% of air time per year talking about Cavanagh. In an interview with an Ulster pirate radio station, she revealed some of the telltale signs:

“One of the first pieces of evidence is the squirming. Joe will wriggle and wobble when Cavanagh’s name is brought up. His excitement is palpable but he provides a smokescreen by making derogatory remarks about his object of desire. For example, when he declared that Cavanagh wasn’t ‘a man’ last year, I think he accidentally revealed a deep-rooted desire for Sean to actually be a woman so that his possible fantasies would appear less odd. That’s my take on it any way.”

LeMonde went on to explain why the County of Tyrone have been at the brunt of Brolly outbursts in recent years:

“Again, this is just my theory but I believe Joe is envious of the entire county. He maybe sees Tyrone as a love rival which Sean appears to be devoted to. It’s an understandable reaction and explains the fist-pumping and red-faced excitement when he gets the chance of dissect a Tyrone defeat and dance on their grave. I think Brolly still hangs on to the hope that Cavanagh retires soon in frustation and is sitting on the couch beside him at RTE headquarters with his gelled hair.”

When asked how these types of infatuations usually end, LeMonde suggested Brolly will make an obvious slip-up in front of the cameras, possible by mistakenly calling him ‘sweetheart’ or ‘my honey’ during another hatchet-job.