Tyrone GAA To Hire Snipers To Nick Spectators Illegally Watching Games Behind Hedges

Tyrone GAA today issued a plea for any good snipers to turn up at Garvaghey tonight for a briefing on this weekend’s matches which are barred to the viewing public.

Current guidelines state that only players and officials are allowed to attend club games but with a sudden increase in hedge-cutting around the perimeter of pitches, the county board are suspicious that many may show up pretending to walk dogs and stuff.

Board member Barry De Burgh explained:

We’ve seen a marked increase in gardening and hedge-cutting around pitches this week. Coupled with ramparts being rid of brackens and ferns, we are sure that some members are planning to attend games on the pretense of being out for a walk. They’ll soon move on that when they feel the whizz going past an ear lobe.

Snipers have been asked to graze onlookers who stay over ten minutes in one particular spot.

In other news, subs on teams have been asked to not take it personally if they’re told to stay at home. In order to comply with guidelines, shite players will be text an hour before throw-in to stay at home and follow the game on Twitter.

About Gombeen

Trying hard to make it up.

Posted on July 16, 2020, in GAA, Garvaghey and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

paul g moss

Theories in Education

Ground*ed Hito

Be the light of your own kind.

Scribbles from me to you

My poetry & prose

Life with Saoirse

The ups, downs, laughter and tears of life in a complex family

Kilbarchan Pipe Band Blog

Registered Charity SC045878

The Media Student's Book Blog

Film and media education

Atmospheric✨

Film * Documentary ✨ Sounds Unlimited

In Dianes Kitchen

Recipes showing step by step directions with pictures and gadget reviews

Video Games Guide - PS Vita, PS3, Xbox , Wii - BestVideoGames.site

Video Games Guide - PS Vita, PS3, Xbox , Wii

Naturesl0vers

All about nature

Dining with Donald

Donald on Dining in and Out.

Fourteen Lines

A Sonnet Obsession

The Irish Peace Process

Catholic Afterthoughts

Ryan Harper Writing

Short Stories, Poems and Songs and random observations

%d bloggers like this: