Dismay As Joe McMahon Ruins Omagh Reputation By Wearing Apron
Omagh residents are said to be furious and ‘pure ripping’ after Joe McMahon was spotted wearing an apron whilst standing at his front door looking at his garden, with a pair of kitchen gloves under his arm.
Having finally shaken off the ‘soft townies’ label which had been unfairly bestowed upon them since the 60s, McMahon’s moment of madness is expected to mean only an All-Ireland title will see the club to return to their recent image transformation.
Pat Monteith, a lifelong clubman and former player of the 80s, admitted:
“It’s like all the good work has been wiped out in the space of 10 seconds. Winning Tyrone and getting to the Ulster final had finally killed off the soft townies perception we’d been wrongly landed with. Joe had been a big part of that. Now he goes and puts on an apron and heads outside. Either his head’s cut or Larry Strain has put him up to this to get the siege mentality going again.”
To make matters worse, it has been reported he was wearing a novelty apron depicting Wonder Woman’s dress. Monteith’s couldn’t hide his anger at this revelation:
“Ah holy god. Them Slaughtneil lads will be all over this. Joe’ll have to lay down a marker straight away and take the head clean off their star player. It’s his duty now. I’m pure rippin.”
McMahon has yet to confirm or deny the apron but a close friend told us he was an avid chef and regularly tries out ambitious dishes such as pavlova or scotch eggs and beans:
“He’s mad about the oul cooking. He didn’t do as well in his A Levels as he should have because he was always sneaking off home to watch reruns of Can’t Cook Won’t Cook. In 20-30 years he’ll be seen as a pioneer but Tyrone is not quite ready in 2014 for lads coming out as avid kitchen practitioners.”
Meanwhile his brother Justin has taken to wearing dark sunglasses until the furore boils down.