No farting at future Scors

Despite romping to an emotional victory in the Tráth na gCeisteanna section of the Ulster Scór final, the newly reformed Windmill GFC were subsequently kicked out of the competition after video footage confirmed a club member in the audience strategically farted on the correct answer every time during the multiple-choice round.

In an exciting contest, the East Tyrone side appeared to emerge victorious by one point over a determined Mayobridge quiz team from County Down, who will now progress to the All-Ireland finals in place the shamed Windmill.

Rumours of skulduggery began to emerge three questions into the 10-question multiple choice round when a loud fart was heard for the third time amongst the large Windmill contingent in the audience. Keen observer Leo Wallace from Bellaghy added:

“I found it odd when the first three rifts miraculously occurred on the correct answer each time. I was keeping a close eye this time and sure enough it happened again. When asked ‘What is the capital of Oman?’ I saw a Windmill supporter on his mobile phone Googling the answer, then shift into position and let rip when the question master offered ‘Muscat’ as one of the options. It was blatant cheating but also you had to admire the man’s ability to produce the wind on demand.”

On leaving the hall, the suspect was taken aside and over a dozen opened tins of beans were found inside his satchel. The offender maintained the beans were for his asthma.

On inspection of the video footage, the evidence became undeniable and the Scór committee had no option but to strike Windmill’s achievement from the record books. The club have also been asked to foot the bill for air fresheners for the hall.