The calm before the storm

Police have urged whist players across the country to calm down a bit after a fifth whist game resulted in a mass brawl last week, this time in the sleepy village of Carrickmore. 

Following on from the shooting in Ardboe last month when an unsuccessful and irate whist player shot at the car tyres of one of his opponents after the event, Carrickmore Social Club was the latest scene of whist violence which threatens to grip the county in fear.

Although the exact reason for the brawl in unclear, onlookers claim there was a menace in the air from the first minute the cards were shuffled. Henry Gormley, a whist expert of 71 years, maintains the game may need to go underground until order is restored again:

“It is out of control. Whist is on the verge of witnessing drive-by shootings and the like. This happened with dominos in the 1970s. All of a sudden domino meetings were witnessing riots all over the county and it was finally halted after a man was scalped in Derrytresk halfway through a game. Us Tyrone ones just take things too seriously after a while.”

Last week there were 32 Whist Drives held in GAA rooms across Tyrone, with police reporting disturbances at 31 of them.