Brocagh Fun Farm ‘A Bit Of A Let Down’
Early reviews of the new fun farm at Ballybeg in Brocagh have been unfavourable after Tyrone’s latest amenity opened its door to journalists before the grand opening later next month. In return, the farm’s organisers have accused local writers of being ‘too spoilt’ and ‘need to lighten up a bit’.
Tyrone Tribulations’ sightseeing expert Tally Molloy filed her report earlier today and agreed with the general consensus that it could have been a lot better.
It reads as follows:
PETTING ZONE: At £10 we were expecting a lot from the experience. The first hint that things might not live up to expectations was the petting zone. What this entailed was lining up behind each other to pet a decaying grey Labrador who was partially blind, lame in two legs and well into her twenties in terms of age. The closer you got to the dog the stronger the stench was getting and on arriving at the petting spot it was hard not to vomit over the creature.
WATERSIDE WALK: In order to sober up after that petting experience
we were encouraged to take the scenic route to witness the wild animals. Called ‘The Waterside Walk’, this was simply walking up a field alongside a massive puddle left by the rain the previous night. We were told to walk around the puddle five times. A man was topping it up with a hose.
WILD ANIMAL SECTION: We were brought to another field and were given binoculars and told to look at the top of a hill about half a mile away. There we could see about a dozen cows, chewing on grass. That was it.
TEA ROOM: This was a converted shed with concrete floor, one plastic table and six crates for sitting on. They served a plastic cup of mineral for £1 and a packet of crisps for 90p.
OVERALL EXPERIENCE: Disappointing. The man who showed us around left us for half an hour at the start as he said it was his dinner time.
Ballybeg Petting Farm have promised to tighten up a few loose ends before the grand opening. They also announced that the Petting Zone is temporarily closed after the timely death of Larry the Labrador.