Tyrone PSNI Plan ‘Best Staff Christmas Party Ever’ On Funds From Ballygawley Speed Camera

338-0801202454-cops-drunk-policeA Tyrone pub have confirmed they received a booking under the codename ‘The Police’ for 300 people in December, opting for the Premium Service Package (£30’000) which includes male strippers, massive German pint glasses and a live performance from a local country and western star. £35’220 was collected from the Ballygawley roundabout camera in 2014 with the promise of a few more pounds before Christmas.

Jordan’s Pub in Eglish will be packed to the rafters after owner Fonzie Jordan accepted the booking with a heavy heart as he himself was caught doing 32 in the 30mph zone last month:

“No one ever bought the Premium Service Package before so it was hard to turn down. It’ll set us up for a few months so I’ll have to bite my lip. But, 32 mph like. They’re a bunch of thieving cowboys. £60 I forked out as did everyone else in that line of motors. There must’ve been about 35 of us all travelling at that speed. I hope their sprouts aren’t too hard”

remarked Jordan with a wink and a smudge of a smile.

Jordan admitted this was not the first mass booking the pub has received in the last five years.

“a lock of years ago the Tyrone County GAA Board booked the Silver Service Package for 56 people which includes female strippers, free nuts for the tables and scented toilet freshener tablets. That put them back £24’000 which coincidentally matched the gate receipts from all club games that year. They had some craic that night and the chairman and all were wearing gold crowns and laughing at the ordinary people in the quiet bar.”

Jordan is also asking for ‘Sting’ from ‘The Police’ to phone back as soon as possible with their menu choices.

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About Gombeen

Trying hard to make it up.

Posted on November 3, 2014, in Ballygawley, Eglish, GAA and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. dedeideoprofundis

    Are you sure it’s not the Guards?

    Like

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