Riots Break Out In Omagh, Dungannon, Cookstown and Strabane Over Lack Of Bounties In Celebrations

Shop owners have called for calm after fighting broke out in stores across the county today after Mars Wrigley said it would be eliminating the sweet from some of its tubs.

The Bounty, which research shows is the one sweet most likely to be left over towards the end of the tin’s lifespan, is a staple sweet in Tyrone and has over 20 Bounty Fan Clubs in its honour, from as far apart as Ardboe and Aughabrack.

A store in Strabane was set alight after a gang of elderly shoppers tore open three boxes to find there were no Bounties in them at all. They also attempted to beat up the man at the Post Office in the shop even though he was only a part-time worker drafted in that day and in reality has nothing to do with Mars.

Dungannon proprietor Willie Baker admitted he fears the Christmas period:

“The over 40s in Tyrone are mad about the Bounty and I forsee trouble ahead. I’ve already barricaded the windows and have hired 3 bouncers for December. And I only own a wee shop. There’ll be mass destruction in them big ones. For the love of God, Mars Wrigley, give them the feckin Bounty back.”

A riot in Coalisland was narrowly averted when the local chip shop lowered its cowboy supper price for the day, with a free Lilt.

About Gombeen

Trying hard to make it up.

Posted on November 4, 2022, in Coalisland, Cookstown, Dungannon, Omagh, Strabane and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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