Blog Archives

Mixed Reaction In Tyrone To Eurovision Disaster

last-place1We were out and about this morning gauging early reactions to last night’s tragedy in Sweden:

 

“Who ever heard of Denmark, like? They can stick their tin whistle up their hole.” B McElduff, Carrickmore

“Them leather trousers lost it. The lad could hardly move. His lad could hardly move. He should’ve thrown some shapes.” M Gildernew, Aghaloo

“See next year. I’m going to enter and during the last bar I’ll turn around, drop my trousers and have ‘Up Yours Europe’ tattooed on my buttocks. That’ll learn them.” F McGuigan, Ardboe

“Trappatoni OUT!” P Canavan, Ballygawley

“I’ve more buckin points on my licence.” G Cavlan, Dungannon

“That girl didn’t even have any shoes and still won. Embarrassing. We need to send a tramp out next year.” P Donaghy, Moy

“Them boys with the bodhrans should’ve worn shirts. And not played bodhrans.” P Begley, Pomeroy

“One point from the UK? No more Mr Kipling for me.” M Cush, Donaghmore

“We’d still drink them under the table. But they won’t have a Eurovision for that, will they?” J Devlin, Gortin

“The lorry-top parade has been cancelled because of ….poor visibility. Yes, the weather is cat.” Strabane Council

“His teeth were too white. People didn’t believe he was Irish. And the tan? Come on, like.” M O’Neill, Clonoe

“We need to send out Bono, all greased up like, playing the accordion and maybe the girls from Betwitched leaping about him singing about the Sean Quinn thing.”  R McMenamin, Dromore

 

International Reaction To Black Card Ruling In GAA

Hand Black Card

A black card will be used in gaelic football from January next year. Motion 4 proposed that a new ‘black card’ be introduced to deal with a specific category of foul, relating to ‘cynical behaviour’ and was passed with a 82% majority at the GAA Annual Congress in Derry today. We gauged reaction to the historic decision across the globe:

“Hell yea! Delighted to hear the dudes in Derry passed this. A victory for democracy. We need to show the dissenters the error of their ways. Had this not been passed we would have considered air strikes on the new Garvaghey complex.  Here, I bet you Ricey’s glad he retired when he did.” PRESIDENT OBAMA, USA

“Bastards, hi!” NADINE COYLE, DERRY

“Mmmm. Do you know who’s been given the gig for making the black cards? Interesting.” SEAN QUINN, FERMANAGH

“O mama. This is just the beginning. Get me in and I’ll have a baseball-type musical jingle as the ref digs around looking for the correct card. Will it be red? The music builds. Will it be yellow. Faster, faster. It’s black. Pantomime booing. Great TV. I like the idea of the hooter at the end. I’ll get women in hooter T-shirts to do it. Kerching! Nailed it!” LOUIS WALSH, MANCHESTER

“I’m undecided. Up the Carmen.” POPE FRANCIS, ROME

“What colour will the black cards be? I hope it’s pink. I love pink.” JORDAN, ESSEX

“Abusive language? Does that include ‘nordie bastards’? BONO, DUBLIN

“You can’t say black!” JOHN TERRY, LONDON

“I hope Conor Gormley brings a cushion to the games. He’ll be spending some time sitting on benches. Cute though.” KATY PERRY, CALIFORNIA

paul g moss

Theories in Education

Ground*ed Hito

Be the light of your own kind.

Scribbles from me to you

My poetry & prose

Life with Saoirse

The ups, downs, laughter and tears of life in a complex family

Kilbarchan Pipe Band Blog

Registered Charity SC045878

The Media Student's Book Blog

Film and media education

LUCID NOW🌜

Ambient Music To The Ethereal And Eternal Idea!

In Dianes Kitchen

Recipes showing step by step directions with pictures and gadget reviews

Video Games Guide - PS Vita, PS3, Xbox , Wii - BestVideoGames.site

Video Games Guide - PS Vita, PS3, Xbox , Wii

Naturesl0vers

All about nature

Dining with Donald

Donald on Dining in and Out.

Fourteen Lines

A Sonnet Obsession

The Irish Peace Process

Catholic Afterthoughts

Ryan Harper Writing

Short Stories, Poems and Songs and random observations

%d bloggers like this: